December 2012 - Day 16 - Pandemics

On the sixteenth day of the apocalypse
My true love said to me:
Oh look...
Sixteen Deadly Viruses
Fifteen Super Volcanoes
Fourteen MPH Earth-Spin
Thirteen Year Nuclear Holocaust
Twelve Decameter Storm Surge
Eleven Superstorms
Ten Plagues of Egypt
Nine Asteroids
Eight Supernovae
Seven Continents Cracking
Six Hour Long Earthquake
Fiiiiiiiiive Alieeeeeeeens!!!!
Four Dinosaurs
Three Hitlers
Two Poles that Shift
And it seems I've become a zombie.

What:

Swine flu
Spanish flu
One flu over the cuckoo's nest (ie, bird flu)
Mad Cow
West Nile
Chicken pox
Cow pox
Small pox
Big pox
Pox in a box
Typhoid fever
Yellow fever
Scarlet fever
Really bad diarrhea from drinking water in Mexico
Bubonic Plague
and...
Ebola.

How:

It was just a really bad flu season, okay?  How am I supposed to know? 

How to Survive:

Stay away from the pox in a box.  We don't know what it is.  Just that it came out of a box that probably escaped from some lab somewhere.

Also, drink Purell for breakfast.

And when all is said and done...