My Summer Project

Guess what I learned today. 

Photography has a lot more to it than I imagined. 

I mean, I knew there were more elements than lighting, angles and having really expensive equipment, but today I finally came to understand that on a deeper, epiphanetic level.  I saw REAL photography, not cheapo amateur engagement pictures.

Take, for example, this Jasmine themed picture:

Beautiful, isn't it?
So, the angle is great, offering a little distortion to emphasize her face and the lamp, and the lighting is beautiful, even, and warm.  The colors work well together, and the gold background adds just the right touch!  All this I knew, and all this I feel able to do.

But, there are some very important details I appear to have overlooked.

Like makeup.  Seriously, look at those eyes!  They're perfect!  The shadow, the liner, everything is perfectly painted and fits just right.

I have NO clue how to do that.  Seriously, about the only thing I know about makeup is that it gives me eyebrows I don't normally have. 

The other problem is that my models don't know how to do that either.  Unless I have a professional makeup artist that follows me around wherever I go (that's to go with the piano that follows me around playing theme music, of course... I have the beginnings of an entourage forming here...), then I'm going to need to know how to do that myself.

I also need to have some idea of costuming - body types and what kind of clothing looks good on what kind of body.

So, I officially have a project for next summer.  Learn basic stage makeup, specifically glamour and fantasy makeup, as well as basic costuming.  That'll get me started.  Then I can take REAL amateur portraits, instead of pathetic ones.

Now, for those of my girlfriends to whom I have promised free engagement pictures, never fear.  I will NOT dress your fiancé up as a magical pixie.  I'm thinking more when I take senior pictures, or do photoshoots for my own pleasure.  This girl, whose photos I was browsing, likes to do story themes, where she combines glamour with characters and costumes from a movie or a book.  It was purely AWESOME.  I'd love to do stuff like that, if I can get the mad makeup and costuming skills that would require.

So, makeup, I shall learn you.  And I shall learn you well.

A growing plague... like bubonic... only it lasts longer.

I'm sitting in class.  The teacher is telling us he wants us to fight the growing plague of stress among students.

Teacher is nuts.

No, seriously.  He just said, and I quote, "I don't want to trip you up."  You want to know what kind of questions he asks on his exam?

Question #384:
What were the main issues in the year 1820?
A.Internal Improvements
B.Communications development
C.Transportation
D.Morality in the governing body
E.Temperance
F.A and E
G. A, B and C
H. B, C, and E
I. All of the above
J. None of the above

Okay, seriously.  He is the ONLY teacher who has asked questions like this since American Heritage, which is designed to break students in to getting bad grades so they can spend their first semester feeling terrible about themselves after getting A's and B's in high school. 

"I don't want to trip you up!  I don't want you to second guess yourself!  Your first instinct is almost always right!"

That's what he said.  Unfortunately, with the way his questions go, we have about 3 first instincts, and naturally second guess ourselves in the process, because the 2nd first instinct is never as strong as the first, and the third is even less so.  In fact, the third instinct has about the same effect as the wrong answer.  So, the student body simply sits there and stares at the test, wondering if there's any possibility of faking a nervous breakdown... or possibly a seizure... just to have the chance to exact revenge and egg the teacher's office while the memory of his torture is still fresh.

Of course, that's assuming the test doesn't give us a REAL nervous breakdown and/or seizure. 

So, will these students fight the growing plague of stress?  When we know we need to memorize 30 terms, answer 50 multiple choice, write some short answer, and then two essays, all while trying not to forget everything we need to know for the other 4 classes in our schedules? 

Heh.

Yeah right.