So, I had a dream last night. It was a bad dream. I woke up feeling mildly traumatized. Now I wonder, why nightmares??? Really? Why?
Now, granted, this one was productive. And by productive, I mean that when I woke up, I realized that some feelings that had been simmering under the surface were the result of someone who had hurt my feelings (who happens to have starred in this miserable dream), and I was able to identify and acknowledge that I felt that way. After my epiphany, I spent a good half hour of the morning crying to myself and envisioning the way I probably won't actually rake him over the coals for being so mean. So, way to go subconscious for helping me to realize that I have a right to feel the way I do.
But, what about all the other nightmares??? I mean, I can't tell you how many times as a little kid I made a beeline for my Mommy and Daddy's bed because the Big Bad Wolf was in my room, or there was a tyrannosaurus rex outside my bedroom window.... or I'd been kidnapped by McCleach from The Rescuers Down Under and my magic powers weren't working. Dang, I hated that dream...
Really, what's the point? I certainly had no grand epiphanies from nightmares as a wee li'l squirt, so why would my subconscious feel the need to inflict genuine terror on an innocent child?
So, for all the times I've fallen off a cliff, driven into a river, been stalked by a knife-wielding maniac, been stared at by the creepy girl from The Ring, had people completely ignore me while I screamed my lungs out, been caught in a tornado, been butt-naked at church, gotten chased by dinosaurs all over Jurassic Park, had Jurassic Park dinosaurs in my house, had my Jedi powers fail while facing Jurassic Park dinosaurs, and a plethora of other horrific non-real experiences, thank you subconscious. You are truly a sadistic entity.
Monday, April 18, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Today's Lesson in World History: Greeks and Latins fight like a bunch of little girls.
Yeah. I'm reading about the Crusades, in preparation to write a paper. This is one of the reasons I really like history. It reveals the little girl slap fights of the Great Emperors of the past.
Let me tell you what I mean.
So, our great emperor's name is Alexios. He was the ruler of all the Byzantine empire. To keep things simple, we'll just refer to the Byzantines as Greeks.
The other players are the French, English, Germans, Italians and Imperial Papacy. To keep all of that simple, we'll just call them the Latins.
The third group, which is really inconsequential to the current story, other than to set the scene for it, consists of Muslim warriors who had control of the Holy Land, and were the "evil" force the Christians set out to conquer in the Crusades. We'll refer to them as Turks.
The beginning of the Crusades goes something like this. The Greeks controlled all of Greece, the Balkans, Turkey, Syria, and a bunch of islands and stuff. They were big and powerful. Then the Turks showed up and started conquering their land. Alexios was a general in the Greek army, watching the Byzantine empire crumble. So, he took over the throne, established himself as emperor, and set to getting things back to their former glory. As part of this, he asked the Latins for mercenaries, because asking the Turks for mercenaries hadn't turned out so well.
That was a mistake.
See, the Latins had issues. First of all, they were extremely busy fighting each other, and the pope was looking for an outlet for their anger. Second of all, well... the Greeks were stinking rich. Constantinople was the single wealthiest city in the world (China doesn't count as this world, because the Western world didn't know about all it had to offer, and as we all know, if the Western world doesn't know about it, it must not exist). Being rich means you have lots of enemies, because everybody wants to beat you up and take your stuff. Now, technically speaking, the Latins and the Greeks were "allies" because they were both Christian. But, after getting in a lover's spat over a technicality in the definition of the Godhead, the Greek Patriarch and the Latin Pope resolved all their differences by excommunicating each other.
Pope: "As we all know, the Holy Spirit comes from the Father and the Son."
Patriarch: "Well, yes, almost. There's one small word I'd like to correct in that sentence. The Holy Spirit comes from the Father through the Son."
Pope: "Why, my dear friend, I believe you have misunderstood the doctrine. It is, clearly, and the Son."
Patriarch: "No, I'm quite sure it is through the Son. Perhaps you just misread it."
Pope: "According to my Vulgate, it is and the Son."
Patriarch: "Well, my Greek Vulgate, which came before your Latin Vulgate, has it through the son."
Pope: "Well, your Greek Vulgate is wrong."
Patriarch: "No, it's not. It came first. It's right. You're wrong."
Pope: "Nuh uh. You're wrong."
Patriarch: "Your mom is wrong."
Pope: *Gasp!* "How dare you!"
Patriarch: "No, how dare you!"
Pope: "No, you!"
Patriarch: "You!"
Pope: "Youyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyou-"
Patriarch: "YOU INFINITY! I WIN!"
Pope: "Fine! I excommunicate you!"
Patriarch: "You can't do that! I excommunicate you!"
Pope: "I excommunicated you before you excommunicated me!"
And so on.
Now, returning to the story of the Crusades.
So, Emperor Alexios of the Greeks asks the Latins for mercenaries. The Latins think, "Oh boy! Now we can reunite our schismed churches and establish the Pope as the true ruler of all of Christendom, as it should be. And, if we just happen to accidentally take over Constantinople while we're at it, then the Greeks would all be better off anyway, right?"
So, the Pope goes around collecting soldiers by telling people the Holy Sepulcher has been desecrated by the Infidel, and the Lord needs soldiers to fight for His cause, so anybody who goes on an armed pilgrimage to Jerusalem will earn forgiveness from all their sins. Oh, and the meeting place for this "pilgrimage" is Constantinople, where the gracious Emperor Alexius has kindly offered them passage across the strait.
So much for mercenaries to help Greece get their empire back.
But, Alexios is a little smarter than that. When the Latins start arriving, he makes them swear an oath of fealty, meaning anything they take over becomes his property, and he'll protect them in their time of need. Now, this oath ends up being a fiasco, but let's not get ahead of ourselves here. Right now we're still at the point where the Latins start showing up.
So, this momentous event was recorded by two people whom we are consulting today: Anna Komnene, daughter of Emperor Alexios, and William of Tyre. These are the two accounts I am studying in preparation for my paper, giving me both sides of this story. Anna was Greek, Willie T was Latin.
Begin slap fight #2.
Anna: "My noble father was sitting on his noble throne, listening to his noble people and their noble issues. He was quite noble."
Willie T: "There was never a more treacherous people than the Greeks, and none so much as the evil Alexius Comnenas."
Anna: "That's spelled Alexios Komnenos, you retard."
Willie T: "Oh, go unwad your panties, princess."
Anna: "When the barbarians came in their hordes, hoping to take Constantinople for themselves, my father was wise. He persuaded the Counts to swear an oath of fealty unto him. But, when the Count Godfrey came, he had heard a false rumor that my father had shut several Counts up in prison."
Willie T: "When the Counts came to Greece, believing themselves to be safe among fellow Christians, they were betrayed, captured by a Duke, and delivered up to the emperor, so that he might do with them as he pleased. He shut them up in prison, deprived them of food and water, and forced them to do the macarena from sun up until sun down! Never had such noble men known such shame! And at the hands of one professing the Christian faith! The brave, valiant, heroic, noble, charitable, just, faithful, gracious, wonderful Count Godfrey (who also had a great tan) sent a letter to the emperor, demanding the release of these prisoners."
Anna: "The Latins overreacted."
Willie T: "When the emperor refused, we burned their cities to the ground, plundered their lands and raped their women!"
Anna: "Overreacting is normal for the Latins. They possess an unstable, irrational nature that lends them to senseless violence when a simple, 'let's talk about this' would suffice."
Willie T: "And then, we besieged the very city of Constantinople itself!"
Anna: "The Latins then tried to attack Constantinople. But, they had no siege equipment, so they just tried to light the gate on fire. The guard put out the fire by peeing on it. My father then sent my darling husband out to their camp with a group of archers, just to send a message. They were to fire a volley of arrows in the general direction of the Latins, missing intentionally, of course."
Willie T: "An army of Greeks descended upon us, blacking out the sun with their arrows. The deadly missiles rained down upon us, slaying many people, and hurting many others!"
Anna: "We might have accidentally hit a person or two."
Willie T: "Then we took to ransacking their countryside. The emperor, fearing for the survival of his empire, sued for peace. He sent his own son, John Comnenas, to us as a hostage, then welcomed us into his city, bestowing glorious gifts upon us. He opened his treasury for us, and showered gold and marvelous gifts on us all! Such a victory we gained over Emperor Alexius Comnenas!"
Anna: "My father sent some soldiers to go talk with the Latins. Before they could even ask what we wanted, the Latins attacked, and a great battle ensued. The Greeks fought bravely, and the Latins turned tail and fled. Shortly after that, Godfrey finally thought better of his endeavors, and agreed to do the emperor's bidding, swearing his oath of fealty. As the newest vassal of the Byzantine Empire, Godfrey and his Latin soldiers were welcomed into the city, and given the customary gifts a vassal of the Byzantine Empire receives. And that is how my father, the Great Alexios Komnenos, defeated the unruly horde of barbarians!"
And that's the point when the historian simply scratches his head and says, "I think I'll write a book on how European society was affected by the kumquat."
Let me tell you what I mean.
So, our great emperor's name is Alexios. He was the ruler of all the Byzantine empire. To keep things simple, we'll just refer to the Byzantines as Greeks.
The other players are the French, English, Germans, Italians and Imperial Papacy. To keep all of that simple, we'll just call them the Latins.
The third group, which is really inconsequential to the current story, other than to set the scene for it, consists of Muslim warriors who had control of the Holy Land, and were the "evil" force the Christians set out to conquer in the Crusades. We'll refer to them as Turks.
The beginning of the Crusades goes something like this. The Greeks controlled all of Greece, the Balkans, Turkey, Syria, and a bunch of islands and stuff. They were big and powerful. Then the Turks showed up and started conquering their land. Alexios was a general in the Greek army, watching the Byzantine empire crumble. So, he took over the throne, established himself as emperor, and set to getting things back to their former glory. As part of this, he asked the Latins for mercenaries, because asking the Turks for mercenaries hadn't turned out so well.
That was a mistake.
See, the Latins had issues. First of all, they were extremely busy fighting each other, and the pope was looking for an outlet for their anger. Second of all, well... the Greeks were stinking rich. Constantinople was the single wealthiest city in the world (China doesn't count as this world, because the Western world didn't know about all it had to offer, and as we all know, if the Western world doesn't know about it, it must not exist). Being rich means you have lots of enemies, because everybody wants to beat you up and take your stuff. Now, technically speaking, the Latins and the Greeks were "allies" because they were both Christian. But, after getting in a lover's spat over a technicality in the definition of the Godhead, the Greek Patriarch and the Latin Pope resolved all their differences by excommunicating each other.
Pope: "As we all know, the Holy Spirit comes from the Father and the Son."
Patriarch: "Well, yes, almost. There's one small word I'd like to correct in that sentence. The Holy Spirit comes from the Father through the Son."
Pope: "Why, my dear friend, I believe you have misunderstood the doctrine. It is, clearly, and the Son."
Patriarch: "No, I'm quite sure it is through the Son. Perhaps you just misread it."
Pope: "According to my Vulgate, it is and the Son."
Patriarch: "Well, my Greek Vulgate, which came before your Latin Vulgate, has it through the son."
Pope: "Well, your Greek Vulgate is wrong."
Patriarch: "No, it's not. It came first. It's right. You're wrong."
Pope: "Nuh uh. You're wrong."
Patriarch: "Your mom is wrong."
Pope: *Gasp!* "How dare you!"
Patriarch: "No, how dare you!"
Pope: "No, you!"
Patriarch: "You!"
Pope: "Youyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyou-"
Patriarch: "YOU INFINITY! I WIN!"
Pope: "Fine! I excommunicate you!"
Patriarch: "You can't do that! I excommunicate you!"
Pope: "I excommunicated you before you excommunicated me!"
And so on.
Now, returning to the story of the Crusades.
So, Emperor Alexios of the Greeks asks the Latins for mercenaries. The Latins think, "Oh boy! Now we can reunite our schismed churches and establish the Pope as the true ruler of all of Christendom, as it should be. And, if we just happen to accidentally take over Constantinople while we're at it, then the Greeks would all be better off anyway, right?"
So, the Pope goes around collecting soldiers by telling people the Holy Sepulcher has been desecrated by the Infidel, and the Lord needs soldiers to fight for His cause, so anybody who goes on an armed pilgrimage to Jerusalem will earn forgiveness from all their sins. Oh, and the meeting place for this "pilgrimage" is Constantinople, where the gracious Emperor Alexius has kindly offered them passage across the strait.
So much for mercenaries to help Greece get their empire back.
But, Alexios is a little smarter than that. When the Latins start arriving, he makes them swear an oath of fealty, meaning anything they take over becomes his property, and he'll protect them in their time of need. Now, this oath ends up being a fiasco, but let's not get ahead of ourselves here. Right now we're still at the point where the Latins start showing up.
So, this momentous event was recorded by two people whom we are consulting today: Anna Komnene, daughter of Emperor Alexios, and William of Tyre. These are the two accounts I am studying in preparation for my paper, giving me both sides of this story. Anna was Greek, Willie T was Latin.
Begin slap fight #2.
Anna: "My noble father was sitting on his noble throne, listening to his noble people and their noble issues. He was quite noble."
Willie T: "There was never a more treacherous people than the Greeks, and none so much as the evil Alexius Comnenas."
Anna: "That's spelled Alexios Komnenos, you retard."
Willie T: "Oh, go unwad your panties, princess."
Anna: "When the barbarians came in their hordes, hoping to take Constantinople for themselves, my father was wise. He persuaded the Counts to swear an oath of fealty unto him. But, when the Count Godfrey came, he had heard a false rumor that my father had shut several Counts up in prison."
Willie T: "When the Counts came to Greece, believing themselves to be safe among fellow Christians, they were betrayed, captured by a Duke, and delivered up to the emperor, so that he might do with them as he pleased. He shut them up in prison, deprived them of food and water, and forced them to do the macarena from sun up until sun down! Never had such noble men known such shame! And at the hands of one professing the Christian faith! The brave, valiant, heroic, noble, charitable, just, faithful, gracious, wonderful Count Godfrey (who also had a great tan) sent a letter to the emperor, demanding the release of these prisoners."
Anna: "The Latins overreacted."
Willie T: "When the emperor refused, we burned their cities to the ground, plundered their lands and raped their women!"
Anna: "Overreacting is normal for the Latins. They possess an unstable, irrational nature that lends them to senseless violence when a simple, 'let's talk about this' would suffice."
Willie T: "And then, we besieged the very city of Constantinople itself!"
Anna: "The Latins then tried to attack Constantinople. But, they had no siege equipment, so they just tried to light the gate on fire. The guard put out the fire by peeing on it. My father then sent my darling husband out to their camp with a group of archers, just to send a message. They were to fire a volley of arrows in the general direction of the Latins, missing intentionally, of course."
Willie T: "An army of Greeks descended upon us, blacking out the sun with their arrows. The deadly missiles rained down upon us, slaying many people, and hurting many others!"
Anna: "We might have accidentally hit a person or two."
Willie T: "Then we took to ransacking their countryside. The emperor, fearing for the survival of his empire, sued for peace. He sent his own son, John Comnenas, to us as a hostage, then welcomed us into his city, bestowing glorious gifts upon us. He opened his treasury for us, and showered gold and marvelous gifts on us all! Such a victory we gained over Emperor Alexius Comnenas!"
Anna: "My father sent some soldiers to go talk with the Latins. Before they could even ask what we wanted, the Latins attacked, and a great battle ensued. The Greeks fought bravely, and the Latins turned tail and fled. Shortly after that, Godfrey finally thought better of his endeavors, and agreed to do the emperor's bidding, swearing his oath of fealty. As the newest vassal of the Byzantine Empire, Godfrey and his Latin soldiers were welcomed into the city, and given the customary gifts a vassal of the Byzantine Empire receives. And that is how my father, the Great Alexios Komnenos, defeated the unruly horde of barbarians!"
And that's the point when the historian simply scratches his head and says, "I think I'll write a book on how European society was affected by the kumquat."
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
That week... you know, the one right before finals that makes finals look warm and fuzzy...
**Sigh**
It's that time again. It's the time where I start freaking out because all my projects are due. At least this year it's easier. I only have 2 major projects that require critical thinking. Otherwise, I'm free to let my mind turn into goop while I just follow instructions on how to put a case on a text block while gluing my hand to the table.
But, tonight is one of those critical thinking nights. I'm writing about Anna Komnene... or Comnena, depending on if you're Westernized or not.
Now, I know Anna gets lots of praise for being a female historian in the notoriously misogynistic middle ages, but really. I don't care if post modern historians love her for being a feminist symbol. Her history sucks.
Now, political propaganda, on the other hand... man! She's got that down. That girlie can sure spin a story to make her dear old dad look like the best thing that ever happened to Byzantium, Greece, and possibly the whole world. She also brags incessantly through the book about herself... her education, her family, her ugly brother who took her throne (sorry honey, feminist power or not, you're not getting the throne), her grandma that she really liked, her poor dead husband for whom she sheds many a tragic tear... etc.
So kudos to you, Anna, for writing the single most biased, inaccurate historical document ever to be praised by educated people.
See? I can write about my topic. That's great. Now to translate THAT thought into something worthy of an academic paper.
[boring monotone] Anna Comnena is praised among historians for the book which she wrote containing an account of her father, Alexius Comnenus. This history, though containing many historical inaccuracies, is an excellent example of feminism in the middle ages. Anna's education, the details of which are explained in the introduction to The Alexiad, and in other places throughout, was extensive, and shows what opportunities were available to women in high places in the Byzantine Empire. [/boring monotone]
See? Look at that! Perfectly accurate, addresses the issues of the day, and has absolutely NONE of my opinions in it! Perfect academic paper.
Now, off to write the last 2 pages of blahdy blah blah.
It's that time again. It's the time where I start freaking out because all my projects are due. At least this year it's easier. I only have 2 major projects that require critical thinking. Otherwise, I'm free to let my mind turn into goop while I just follow instructions on how to put a case on a text block while gluing my hand to the table.
But, tonight is one of those critical thinking nights. I'm writing about Anna Komnene... or Comnena, depending on if you're Westernized or not.
Now, I know Anna gets lots of praise for being a female historian in the notoriously misogynistic middle ages, but really. I don't care if post modern historians love her for being a feminist symbol. Her history sucks.
Now, political propaganda, on the other hand... man! She's got that down. That girlie can sure spin a story to make her dear old dad look like the best thing that ever happened to Byzantium, Greece, and possibly the whole world. She also brags incessantly through the book about herself... her education, her family, her ugly brother who took her throne (sorry honey, feminist power or not, you're not getting the throne), her grandma that she really liked, her poor dead husband for whom she sheds many a tragic tear... etc.
So kudos to you, Anna, for writing the single most biased, inaccurate historical document ever to be praised by educated people.
See? I can write about my topic. That's great. Now to translate THAT thought into something worthy of an academic paper.
[boring monotone] Anna Comnena is praised among historians for the book which she wrote containing an account of her father, Alexius Comnenus. This history, though containing many historical inaccuracies, is an excellent example of feminism in the middle ages. Anna's education, the details of which are explained in the introduction to The Alexiad, and in other places throughout, was extensive, and shows what opportunities were available to women in high places in the Byzantine Empire. [/boring monotone]
See? Look at that! Perfectly accurate, addresses the issues of the day, and has absolutely NONE of my opinions in it! Perfect academic paper.
Now, off to write the last 2 pages of blahdy blah blah.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
When all else fails, eat poop.
I made poop today! It was quite delicious. I mixed powdered sugar, butter, cream cheese and cocoa in a plastic bag and kneaded it until it was all hard like fudge. Only, when you make fudge in a plastic bag and knead it, it turns to form a turd shape. Who knew plastic bags were just like a large intestine!
So, today I had drama. All sorts of drama. Roommate drama, family drama... drama with my mama...
Not really. I didn't have drama with my mama. I don't even call her mama. I call her Momma. I'm pretty sure that's not a correct spelling, but I like it. So there.
Anywho, there was drama.
So, I was sitting there, kneading my poop fudge, making lots of noise. Then I ate the poop fudge.
The heavens opened... angels sang... the whole world rejoiced! Savannah had FUDGE!!!!
Then, my drama all went away.
The end.
So, let that be a lesson to you. When the world is down on you, and you feel like there's no escape, eat poop.
So, today I had drama. All sorts of drama. Roommate drama, family drama... drama with my mama...
Not really. I didn't have drama with my mama. I don't even call her mama. I call her Momma. I'm pretty sure that's not a correct spelling, but I like it. So there.
Anywho, there was drama.
So, I was sitting there, kneading my poop fudge, making lots of noise. Then I ate the poop fudge.
The heavens opened... angels sang... the whole world rejoiced! Savannah had FUDGE!!!!
Then, my drama all went away.
The end.
So, let that be a lesson to you. When the world is down on you, and you feel like there's no escape, eat poop.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Justice. It's what's for dinner.
Some things are served on silver platters. Like heads of prophets who anger ancient Israelite royalty, for example.
Roasted pigs with apples in their mouths tend to be served on silver platters.
Some people say justice is served on a silver platter.
Let me just say that this is not true.
Justice is served on a skewer that has been roasted over an open flame.
Eat that.
Roasted pigs with apples in their mouths tend to be served on silver platters.
Some people say justice is served on a silver platter.
Let me just say that this is not true.
Justice is served on a skewer that has been roasted over an open flame.
Eat that.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Don't be a hater, yo!
That's right. Yo. Yes, I just said that. No, I don't speak Ebonics. Heck, I barely know what Ebonics is, and I probably have a slightly skewed definition of it. I think it's the dialect of English that black people speak.
Anyway, I was reading the news today, and for the first time since I started reading it, it was really depressing! Usually I love reading about all the death and destruction in the Middle East. It's fascinating! It's one really huge drama unfolding into events that will one day be in world history text books. And yes, I'm living to see it! I'll take the high gas prices. Historical global turmoil is so worth it!
No, I'm not crazy. I'm a history major. So nyah.
So, while I was editing a set of engagement pictures I took this past weekend, my big computer was being characteristically slow, so I decided to pull up the news on my little computer to keep myself entertained while each edit loaded. Seriously, I NEED to get a new computer for my pictures. Maybe a Mac next time... after I win $10,000 and can afford anything other than a cheap PC.
*Ahem* Back from that tangent.
Anyway, the front page story was about protests at a soldier's funeral. This fundamentalist Christian group has taken to protesting soldier's funerals as a way of drawing attention to the fact that God is punishing our nation for acceptance of homosexuality by killing our soldiers.
How did they draw that connection? That's a great question! Let me tell you.
According to the news article I read, one of the fundamentalist guys said that God punishes the wicked by giving them pain, and nothing is more painful than having your child killed. Therefore, the dead soldiers are punishment for our nation's acceptance of homosexuality. Can't you see the connection? It's so clear!
Anyway, the picture on the front of the article showed a bunch of protesters holding signs that said, "God hates you," and "Thank God for dead soldiers," and "God hates Obama!" (???!)
Now, clearly, the article being slanted against these protesters, the photographer is going to take a picture of the nastiest, most vengeful, hateful signs he can find, and maybe get three of the nastiest people to stand next to each other so he can get them all in one shot. The goal of that picture was to display the bias of the article in order to create inflammatory feelings in the viewer.
Well, it worked.
Sorry, but I don't care how slanted the article was (and yes, there was a definite slant in it), but that stuff bugs me. The whole using God to promote your hateful agenda thing? Not cool. Go ahead, protest homosexuality. Stand up for your beliefs. Just do it nicely. Don't claim God hates anyone because guess what! You're not God!
**Jumping off soapbox now**
Sorry, that was not meant to be a rant on my opinion of the matter. And believe me, I could write (and have written) a whole long discourse of my opinion on that particular subject, but such thoughts are confined to me journal, which you are not allowed to read, so BA HA HA HA HA!
The thing that intrigued me was the emotional response that article gave me. I was definitely at least a little annoyed, but mostly it was just depressing. Then I read an article on the pope's efforts to combat the world's raging anti-Semitism, and I got more depressed. Then I read an article about how Tennessee is attempting to pass a law that makes following Shariah (Islamic law) illegal. Then I read an article on Gadhafi's airstrikes against rebels in Libya, and my day picked up significantly.
So, in short, today I had a great moment of self discovery, where I learned that the state of the world DOES depress me at times, but not regarding wars and explosions and blood and people dying and stuff. It's people being hateful and mean.
Meaning, if I ever want to be happy, I have no choice but to spend the rest of my life hiding from mean people. I think I shall live in a hollow tree in Manitoba. That's in Canada. I'll spend the rest of my life there, and my friends will be the snow bunnies and the moose. Mooses. Meese. Whatever.
Anyway, I was reading the news today, and for the first time since I started reading it, it was really depressing! Usually I love reading about all the death and destruction in the Middle East. It's fascinating! It's one really huge drama unfolding into events that will one day be in world history text books. And yes, I'm living to see it! I'll take the high gas prices. Historical global turmoil is so worth it!
No, I'm not crazy. I'm a history major. So nyah.
So, while I was editing a set of engagement pictures I took this past weekend, my big computer was being characteristically slow, so I decided to pull up the news on my little computer to keep myself entertained while each edit loaded. Seriously, I NEED to get a new computer for my pictures. Maybe a Mac next time... after I win $10,000 and can afford anything other than a cheap PC.
*Ahem* Back from that tangent.
Anyway, the front page story was about protests at a soldier's funeral. This fundamentalist Christian group has taken to protesting soldier's funerals as a way of drawing attention to the fact that God is punishing our nation for acceptance of homosexuality by killing our soldiers.
How did they draw that connection? That's a great question! Let me tell you.
According to the news article I read, one of the fundamentalist guys said that God punishes the wicked by giving them pain, and nothing is more painful than having your child killed. Therefore, the dead soldiers are punishment for our nation's acceptance of homosexuality. Can't you see the connection? It's so clear!
Anyway, the picture on the front of the article showed a bunch of protesters holding signs that said, "God hates you," and "Thank God for dead soldiers," and "God hates Obama!" (???!)
Now, clearly, the article being slanted against these protesters, the photographer is going to take a picture of the nastiest, most vengeful, hateful signs he can find, and maybe get three of the nastiest people to stand next to each other so he can get them all in one shot. The goal of that picture was to display the bias of the article in order to create inflammatory feelings in the viewer.
Well, it worked.
Sorry, but I don't care how slanted the article was (and yes, there was a definite slant in it), but that stuff bugs me. The whole using God to promote your hateful agenda thing? Not cool. Go ahead, protest homosexuality. Stand up for your beliefs. Just do it nicely. Don't claim God hates anyone because guess what! You're not God!
**Jumping off soapbox now**
Sorry, that was not meant to be a rant on my opinion of the matter. And believe me, I could write (and have written) a whole long discourse of my opinion on that particular subject, but such thoughts are confined to me journal, which you are not allowed to read, so BA HA HA HA HA!
The thing that intrigued me was the emotional response that article gave me. I was definitely at least a little annoyed, but mostly it was just depressing. Then I read an article on the pope's efforts to combat the world's raging anti-Semitism, and I got more depressed. Then I read an article about how Tennessee is attempting to pass a law that makes following Shariah (Islamic law) illegal. Then I read an article on Gadhafi's airstrikes against rebels in Libya, and my day picked up significantly.
So, in short, today I had a great moment of self discovery, where I learned that the state of the world DOES depress me at times, but not regarding wars and explosions and blood and people dying and stuff. It's people being hateful and mean.
Meaning, if I ever want to be happy, I have no choice but to spend the rest of my life hiding from mean people. I think I shall live in a hollow tree in Manitoba. That's in Canada. I'll spend the rest of my life there, and my friends will be the snow bunnies and the moose. Mooses. Meese. Whatever.
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